Deb Potts, who co-authored Love on Life Support with her husband Bruce, has graciously written this guest blog post on mentoring…
My husband and I have been mentoring married couples at our church since 2012. Before that, we each mentored younger individuals. Mentoring is a calling for us.
What is a Mentor?
Webster defines mentor as a “wise and trusted counselor or teacher.” In the church, we think of mentoring as personalized discipleship. Mentors can guide or teach but always in a personalized way, providing a safe space and a listening ear for their mentees to learn to apply the teachings of the Bible to their own personal life. Mentors are always older than their mentees and can call upon their Christian walk as well as their life experience as they mentor.
In our novel, Love on Life Support, Jim and Linda are mentors to our main characters, Chris and Amy. We wrote key strengths into Jim and Linda’s characters which we believe exemplified good mentorship. Our mentors aren’t perfect people, and we hope we portray them as real, flawed characters. After all, none of us will be “done” until we are in the presence of the Lord.
Although Love on Life Support is primarily about Chris and Amy and the dire disaster they are living through, we wanted to introduce the concept of mentoring as a sub-theme in our novel.
What characteristics are important for a mentor?
Jim and Linda are open about their flaws. Both mentors share openly about how they’ve failed in their marriage. They don’t have the attitude that they’ve “arrived” as Christians or as a married couple. Like us, they have encountered struggles in their marriage, and have come out on the other side stronger in their faith and their love because of it.
In Love on Life Support, Jim and Linda are minor characters, and in mentoring, we are minor characters in the lives of our mentees. The couples we mentor are the heroes of their story, not us. We are merely guides, who have travelled on the road of marriage longer than they have. Therefore, we can support, pray for, and guide our younger friends through the trials they are going through.
Jim and Linda have a vibrant relationship with the Lord. As mentors, we are constantly going to God for wisdom and guidance. We don’t have life all figured out, but we know He is always with us in this imperfect world. Our strength comes from Him and so does our wisdom.
What about you? Could you be a Mentor?
In our church we’ve been blessed because we have a formal mentor training program to help us get started. But if your church doesn’t provide that, where can you start? Here are some simple steps to help you get started.
First, pray for your own discernment and wisdom and dependence on the Holy Spirit. Ask God to make you aware of a younger person who might need a kind, listening ear. You could also read Love on Life Support for practical examples of mentorship.
One way to get started is by informally inviting a younger woman for coffee. Ask her how you can pray for her. Research shows most millennials would love to have an older person to mentor them. Often, they’re just waiting to be asked. You don’t have to have it all figured out!
Another way to begin walking like a mentor is to start a small group for younger women. Providing a comfortable place to meet and a safe place to share life’s ups and downs is a priceless gift. Grab a girlfriend and start a group together.
“…the hours, days, weeks, and years do not belong to us but are the gentle reminders of our call to give, not only love and work, but life itself to those who follow us and will take our place.” Henri Nouwen
What better way to do that than to be a mentor?
Deb and Bruce Potts mentor couples in their church, train other mentors and nurture a space where marriages can thrive. They were compelled to weave their experiences and their know-how as marriage mentors into a captivating story to help encourage any couple going through serious life struggles.
Leave A Comment
You must be logged in to post a comment.