Like many fellow Baby Boomers, I’ve been segueing into retirement. If you were born between 1946 and 1964, you might be doing the same—or you might already be there!

Whatever stage you’re in, would you like to know what many retirees find to be their greatest challenge?

It’s people!

Yes, we miss all those people we used to work with, all those social relationships we had with human beings. Meetings, projects, phone calls, emails, meals, business trips, professional associations, hallway conversations, drinks after work, carpooling. All of that is gone now, and replacing those social connections is daunting.

Being self-employed as an executive/career coach for more than 30 years, believe me, I had connections, friendships, and relationships galore. During the pandemic, I decided to segue out of that career, and it seemed no one was getting together for any reason except doctor’s appointments and grocery shopping.

Bored, I decided to write my first novel. That went well, but if I didn’t find a way to expand my contacts beyond family members, I knew I’d lose my mind.

So, I took a few steps to create new relationships and strengthen old friendships. Maybe you’ll get a few ideas from my experiences.

— I went on NextDoor.com, a site that shares information on local happenings, and posted that I was forming a group for retired/semi-retired women who had their Covid shots and wanted to get together for walks, golfing, and other activities. Within two days, more than 60 women had signed up. Since its inception, the group has dwindled, yet many enduring friendships live on.

— As I began writing my novel, I realized I had an awful lot to learn. Although I’d already written three nonfiction books and was a newspaper columnist for more than 20 years, writing a novel is radically different from nonfiction and journalism. So I joined some national and local writers’ organizations, where I’ve developed lasting friendships in the writing community. Some of my new best friends live far away, but Zoom keeps us close.

— My husband and I decided to buy a house with a swimming pool. We live near Pittsburgh, where an outdoor pool is usable only a few months of the year, so we bought a house with one indoors. There’s nothing like a pool heated to 92 degrees to get people to show up at your house in the middle of winter. Family members are welcome anytime, of course, and I invite groups of friends a couple times a month. I usually invite women who already know one another or have something in common. Maybe they’re from that NextDoor group, or from a church where I was active many years, or they’re my neighbors, or classmates I’ve reconnected with at high school reunions, or people I’ve known from my professional life.

— This Christmas, I’m planning to organize neighbors to do some caroling along our street, which is about two miles long. I think the experience will create goodwill among neighbors and opportunities for people to bond.

The support of my writer friends has spurred me onto the final stages of my second manuscript, and God willing, a third will be written after that. As much as I enjoy all my friends, I still love writing, and that requires solitude. Not a bad thing at all—when you’re in the mood for it!

 

Falling Apart, Falling for You (Elk Lake Publishing, 2022) is available online wherever books are sold, and sequels will be released by the same publisher in late 2023 and in 2024. Before You Write your Novel: What to Know from the Get-Go is available on Amazon.