Dizzy over Downsizing

As we age, it’s only natural to have accumulated a lot of belongings—furniture, jewelry, photographs, books, dishes, gardening tools, trinkets from memorable vacations, maybe even a collection of CDs, encyclopedias, or National Geographic magazines. In my second book, which features three women in their late 50s, one of them moves her mom to a retirement facility. In the process, she learns her mom is a hoarder. Or at least a partial hoarder—over the years, she has filled two spare bedrooms to the brim.

My heart goes out to this fictional woman. She’s forced to move to a new place and give up her comfortable surroundings. As we get older, though, downsizing becomes inevitable, even though it can be hard to part company with the memories of all those items—as well as the money we spent to acquire them.

Those of us who have raised a family may be tempted to box the items up and “donate” them to our children. Surely they could put our silver cake plate to good use! They’ll treasure these old lamps! They’ll definitely want to keep our collection of RPMs!

May I make a suggestion?

Before attempting to pass these belongings along, ask your children if they have room for—or interest in—the items. It may come as a shock, but most of the time, they’ll say no thanks. No explanation, no waffling, no discussion. Just “no thanks.”

If you’ve encountered this situation and are still wondering what to do with your no-longer-needed belongings, why not have a “giveaway day”? Arrange items on tables and countertops and mark the furniture you want to give away. Ask your children if they care to come by first, then hold an open house for anyone else who’s interested.

After giving away everything you can, box up the balance and take it to a local charity or arrange for a furniture pick up.

You’ll feel relieved to have blessed so many people with your belongings. And if you think there’s something you’ll miss after it’s gone, you can always save a picture of it on your cellphone.